|Only in America
We're the country that has more food to eat than any other country in the world, and with more diets to keep us from eating it. We will work hard on a farm so we can move into town . . . where we can make more money so we can move back to the farm. In the office we talk about baseball, shopping or fishing, but when we're out at the game, the mall or on the lake, we talk about business.
We're supposed to be the most civilized nation on earth, but we still deliver payrolls in armored cars. We know the line-up of every baseball team in the American and National Leagues but mumble through half the words in the "Star Spangled Banner". We'll spend half a day looking for vitamin pills to make us live longer, then drive 80 miles an hour on slick pavement to make up for lost time. We demand speed laws that will stop fast driving, then won't buy a car if it can't go over 100 miles an hour.
"The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver." ~~ Jay Leno